In Kenya, men with female surnames push back against social stigma

Across Kenya, a small but growing number of men are choosing to carry surnames that once belonged exclusively to women — those of their wives, mothers, or female relatives — and finding themselves at the centre of an unexpected cultural dispute. Their decisions are upending a deeply rooted naming tradition in which children, and later adults, are identified by their father’s first name used as a family surname.

A long-standing naming convention

In many Kenyan communities, the practice of treating a father’s given name as a family identifier has shaped identity for generations. A man named, for instance, Joseph would often see his children recorded under the surname “Joseph,” a system that binds lineage to patrilineal descent. The convention is so embedded that official documents, school records and even casual introductions tend to follow this pattern, reinforcing the perception that a surname should reflect male ancestry.

Why some men are opting for female surnames

Changing family structures, urbanisation and shifting attitudes toward gender roles are prompting some Kenyan men to question the convention. In some cases, men have taken on their wives’ surnames as a mark of respect or partnership. In others, men raised by single mothers or female relatives have chosen to honour the woman who raised them. There are also practical motivations, including avoiding confusion when several relatives share a common given name, or simply a desire for a more distinctive family identity in an increasingly mobile society.

Social pushback and ridicule

Such choices, however, often meet with disapproval. Men who adopt female surnames report being mocked by peers, questioned by relatives and occasionally challenged by bureaucratic offices unaccustomed to seeing the configuration on identification documents. The ridicule tends to draw on ideas of masculinity and inheritance, with critics suggesting that a man who abandons his father’s name is severing ties with his lineage. For those making the change, the social cost can be significant, particularly in rural settings where communal opinion carries weight.

A quiet shift in identity

Despite the resistance, those embracing female surnames describe their choice as a personal statement rather than a rejection of heritage. They argue that identity should not be confined to one side of a family and that naming practices, like societies, can evolve. Conversations about gender, lineage and belonging are unfolding more openly in Kenyan towns and cities, suggesting that even if the tradition of patrilineal surnames endures, its grip on the country’s sense of identity may be loosening.

Source: BBC News — read the original report.